Lets all Go To Walmart!
by NekoyoukaiAlisha
Summary: Itachi, Kakashi, Athrun and Kira, all go to Walmart for a little ninjaGundam shopping.
1. Chapter 1

Lets All Go to Wal-Mart!

Chapter 1

Emo Ninja

Disclaimer: I do not own Wal-Mart, or any Naruto or any Gundam Seed Characters.I also do not own Panic! At the Disco, Billy Talent or the Emo Song, that and the bajo are property of someone who pwns! I DO OWN RANDOMNESS THOUGH MWUAHAHAHA! –gets shot by random person- or not…

It was the best of times; it was the worst of times. It was the time, "Time for NINJA SHOPPING!" Yelled out Itachi, who was very very excited. Kakashi rolled his eyes, following the jumping ninja until he reached his room. Both Kakashi and Itachi looked forward to this time. It was when all ninja's headed out to their closest ninja retailer to restock all their ninjaie (Nin-ja-ee) Items and accessories.

Itachi slipped out of his old ninja clothes and into a pair of skinny emo pants, adding on a tight bright pink

Panic! At the Disco shirt and black converse shoes, Itachi looked into his full length mirror and nodded allowing his bangs to flip across his right eye. Yup, he was perfect. Grabbing his acoustic guitar he played a few meaningful chords.

Kakashi, in the room beside Itachi's, got dressed in ripped up black baggy pants; hanging a few chains off of them he slipped on a random black, also ripped, on. Putting on his comfy skater shoes, Kakashi went to go sneak up on the little emo ninja. Meanwhile, Itachi took out on of his throwing knives. "Life's a bitch why won't everyone die why doesn't anyone love me?" he muttered to himself all in one sentence. Bringing the blade down, Kakashi burst through the door, scaring the living crap out of Itachi, who hurled the knife at his poster of Billy Talent, accidentally stabbing Benjamin Kowalewicz in the face.

Kakashi burst out laughing as Itachi's face contorted to that of a frog…or a very angry emo ninja. "YOU OMISH FRUITCAKE, LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY PRECIOUS BEN!" Itachi started to cry and mutter something about mending his bleeding heart. Kakashi left the room slowly coming back with a banjo. "EMO SONG, EMO SONG, THIS IS THE EMO SONG…

This is my e-mo song.

Yes my e-mo song,

Why don't you sing a-long?

To my e-mo song"

Kakashi sang horribly playing random notes on the banjo, making Itachi cry even harder. Poking Itachi in the side Kakashi ran out, squealing something about emo cheese. Itachi let out a final sob, deciding he would put Ben's face to rest later. Sniffling lightly, Itachi grabbed his Ipod and cranked it on Hawthorn Heights, than ran out screaming high pitch how he would buy all the ninja cheese before Kakashi. The ninja shopping spree had then begun.


	2. Chapter 2

Lets all go to Wal-Mart

Chapter Two

Kira and Athrun's Gundam Dilemma

Kira moaned in his sleep as he twisted and turned, he was having one of those dream again. Kira woke up a cold sweat and tangled up in his bed sheets, gasping for air. Still half asleep, Kira screamed out, "OH YOU SEXY TREES!" Kira lost his balance on his bed and fell to the floor with a thump. Athrun randomly came in running with a bag of jellybeans, "OMFGROTFLMFAO!" Kira looked at him like he was on something, which he probably was. Athrun ran into the room, in the process tripping over Kira making rainbow colour jellybeans fly all over the room. "OH NOES, MY BABIES!"

Athrun got down on his knees and cried out in angst. Pausing for a second he looked at Kira who he was currently lying on top of. "Was it the trees again?" Athrun looked to Kira, who pouted and nodded his head slowly. "Catch any this time?" Kira grinned perversely and nodded again.

Forgetting all about his lost jellybeans, Athrun got off Kira and gave him a hand up. All of a sudden Kira's eyes got really really really really wide. Tugging on Athrun's pants, Kira squealed. "IT'S BUY YOUR NEW GUNDAM ACCESSORIES DAY!" Athrun looked puzzled for a second, just like that time he walked in on that giant rat trying to rape his precious Tea Cup Chihuahua. Damn, that was really awkward.

Athrun paced around Kira for a minute trying to shake that memory from his head. The realization of Gundam shopping day hit him like a ton of jellybeans Athrun squealed. "Yay, FUZZY DICE!" Kira Grabbed Athrun's hand and they dances around until Kira slipped on a particularly green jellybean.

Jumping up again, Kira shoved Athrun out of his room and quickly changed in a pair of jeans and a red muscle shirt. Running out his door he knocked on Athrun's door (Athrun magically went to his room). "Hurry up Athrun!" Athrun's door slowly opened and random creepy music played in the background. Kira slipped in, slightly freaked out, creeping past the shadows that lurked in Athrun's room. Than, in the middle of the room, centered in flashy lights and spotlights, stood gangsta Athrun. His baggy jeans hung below his bum, showing off his I love trees underpants. Gold chains hung around his neck and he was covered in bling bling. His baggy black shirt hid his 6 pack buy showed off his muscular arms.

Kira couldn't take it anymore; he fell on the floor laughing. "Oh…my…God…you …look like…a fag...!" Athrun turned around to go attack Kira for cramping his style but ended up tripping over his pants and doing a face plant into the wood floor. Kira couldn't contain himself and before he knew it he was surrounded by a wet warm puddle. Both boys let out a sigh, then a giggle, then Athrun kicked Kira ass.

Kira went back to his room and quickly changed into a clean pair of jeans. "Come on Athrun, think of all the trees I have to hug on the way to the Gundam accessory retailer!" Athrun rushed out the door followed by Kira. "HERE I COME, FUZZY DICE!" Athrun yelled with glee. His Gundam would look so sexy with hot pink fuzzy dice hanging from its ceiling. While on the way to the retailer store Athrun tripped over his pants 6 times, pulled Kira off of 11 trees and broke up a fight between Kira and a dog, they were fighting over a particularly sexy tree.

Gundam Accessory day had just begun.

NOTE: WAL-MART WILL BE IN THE NEXT CHAPTER! The disclaimer counts for the whole story, cause I'm lazy.


	3. Chapter 3

Lets all go to Wal-Mart

Chapter 3

MY CHEETOS! 

This Chapter is dedicated to The Jar Head, who has reviewed...and made me feel special.

Anyways, enjoy, has anyone else noticed that these chapters are getting lamer and lamer?

Disclaimer: I do not own anything by Dane Cook or Dane Cook himself, sadly. I don't own Wal-Mart or any of the animes I'm using and I will not make any profit of using these things.

Itachi jumped up and down, squirming in his tight pants, realizing how tight they really were. "Kakashi, my legs can't breath!" Kakashi stifled a giggle and pokes Itachi in the thigh, which cause him to squeal and fall over, twitching momentarily.

Getting off the dusty, dirty ground Itachi calmly brushed himself off and walked a few paces before tackling Kakashi. "EWWW get it off, get it off EMO GERMS!" Kakashi yelled trying to detangle himself from a now insanely emotional Itachi. Calming down for a second Kakashi patted his companion's head and tried to detach him slowly. Randomly a priest was walking down that same sidewalk caught a glimpse of the 'lover's' scene.

Striding over to the boys the priest placed a hand on the Kakashi's shoulder, "There is hope for you my boy" While the priest was rambling on about gays going to hell, Itachi cleared up his thoughts. Once again jumping around, "Hey home slice, I love Itachi, and there's nothing you can do about it!"

With a final sniffle Itachi grabbed a very confused Kakashi by the hand and they left a fuming priest behind them. A few meters up, Kakashi snatched his hand back from Itachi and smacked him in the back of the head.

Ignoring it, Itachi walked on, mumbling something about how much drowning in a pool would suck. Scratching his head Kakashi added, "No way, it would suck to be drowning in a pool then someone poured oil into the pool, so you're drowning in a pool of flame." Itachi stared, "NO! It would suck to find a hole in the flames then when you got to the surface for air a big black guy would punch you in the face telling you to get back under the flames and continue drowning."

Both Ninjas looked at each other for a minute, still walking, staring, walking, staring, until Itachi smashed into a random hydro pole. Whipping out his list of people to kill Itachi wrote, "Kill hydro pole."

The ninjas walked on until they reached their desired location. Posted on the door, in big bright letters, "Sorry for the inconvenience, the ninja retail store has been bought by Wal-Mart." Itachi and Kakashi stared at the sign for a minute, two minutes, after about an hour they both broke down into tears of misery.

After about an hour of that, they looked at each other and yelled "To Canada to conquer this WAL-MART!"

Halfway across Japan, Kira and Athrun had encountered this same problem.

Kira clung to the nearest tree and Athrun, of course, tripped over his baggy pants in confusion. Athrun went over to Kira and slapped him in the face, "WE ARE GOING TO TAKE OVER WAL-MART!"

Kira chuckled evilly while rubbing the side of his face. "First Wal-Mart, then Canada, and then THE WORLD"

Both boys chucked insanely as they began to conceive their plan of HOW THE HELL they we're going to get to Canada let alone Wal-Mart.

REVIEW!!!! Please and thankies btw, I HEART MEL MORE THAN L'ECCHI! I love you too Orange.


	4. Chapter 4

Lets All Go to Wal-Mart

Chapter 4

Revenge of the Cheese

Chyaa! Chapter 4! Yush peeps, all Wal-Mart's are in Canada, though I kinda got that idea from The Jar Head. Smankss! Revieww le please!?

Kira smacked into the sliding door, of course he didn't know it was sliding door.

Yes, Kira and Athrun found Wal-Mart; they parked their Gundam in the so called 'Parking lot.' Athrun poked Kira in the side, "Hey tree boy, have you notice people are staring at us" Athrun looked to Kira who was staring down a little kid in a stroller.

Pulling Kira away before they got arrested for making children cry. Athrun repeated his question, "Huh? Oh yeah! Don't worry Athrun these Canadians are just staring because they don't know the meaning of sexy"

Kira ripped off his shirt and started singing Sexy back (Don't own it). Then it happened, they hit the door. Kira smooshed his face against the once clean glass and peered inside. His squished face gave the appearance of a yellowy redish Pancake.

Right in front of his nose was a cheese display. "ZOMG CHEESE!" Kira peeled his face off the door and vainly tried to get it open, ignoring the "Use the next door, located right beside you" sign.

Athrun calmly walked into the store dragging a confuzzled Kira with him. They leapt into the store slow motion while victory music played in the background. Of course, in slow motion, Athrun tripped over his pants and fell into the cheese display, bringing Kira with him.

Meanwhile, Kakashi and Itachi easily found their way into the store with the help of those people, in the annoying blue vests. "Can I help you"

One asked Kakashi. Kakashi thought and then yelled to the woman, "TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER!" With a creepily cheery smile the person answered, "Oh, you must mean the manager, well you go straight then turn left to go to his office."

Kakashi and Itachi followed her directions only to end up at a huge, yellow, smiling, smiley thing. "Make peace not war!" Itachi hugged the over sized piece of cardboard. A voice came over the Store speakers, "CLEAN UP ON THE CHEESE DISPLAY!" That was it, Itachi and Kakashi shredded the rollback smiley. Then they ran around falling right into the heap of cheese.

It was dark in the cheese heap; Itachi heard a voice, "Kira! That better be your knee and not something else!" Who the fuck is Kira? Thought Itachi. Itachi got scared and squealed out "Kakashi, BABY BOY WHERE ARE YOU!?" Another guy called out, "ZOMG, there's an emo fruitcake in here!"

Itachi heard Kakashi's voice. "I don't know who you are but we need to eat our way out!" Kira responded with a "No wait; I'll just use the seed!" Athrun squirmed in the dark cheesiness,

"NO Kira not the seeeeeeeed."

Just then the cheese pile blew up, sending bits of cheese everywhere.

"Itachi hugged Kira, WE'RE ALIVE RANDOM PERSON!" Kakashi stared at Athrun, Athrun stared at Kakashi, and they both stared at Itachi and Kira. This was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.


End file.
